8 Steps To Overcome a Crisis
Salam alaikum! I hope that you are well, but if you’re reading this, then it is likely that you or a loved one is going through a difficult patch. Life brings challenges when we least expect them- and given that we can even be hurt by people we love, having to deal with such a situation is going to happen at least once. We are all unique individuals and deal with things in our own way, but we may need a little help to get started. So here are a few tips to help you get through those first difficult moments.
- Take a breath: One of the first things that happen when we are in shock of any kind is that we stop breathing. Sit down and take a breath, or two or even three. If you are feeling angry with someone, then this will be the best way of allowing that to dissipate a little so that you can think clearly.
- Get help immediately: You may have lots of friends and family to talk to, but they may not have the skills to help you through. This is a crises and it needs someone who can be objective and listen to you without wanting to fix things. This need not be a long term thing, but a trauma counsellor, coach, or healer can help you through those first few critical weeks.
- Be selective: You may have the urge to share your troubles with all your friends and family but be selective. You may be feeling vulnerable at this time and everyone may not provide you with the understanding or empathy you need; this can leave you feeling even more hurt. Share your feelings with those who will listen without judgement, and may even let you cry it out.
- Feel the feelings: Please do not expect yourself to get over this immediately. The body has its own speed of releasing emotions after a trauma. Feel the waves of emotions that come up. Ask those around you to just be support. Ask them to allow you to grieve. Feeling things through is the quickest way of healing them. If you bury them, they are sure to come up later in the form of disease. Your emotions will take time to release and your body will take time to heal. Give yourself the room to be and take one day at a time.
- Eat well and exercise: Your body is going to be releasing toxins into the system as situations such as these encourage the fight/flight response in the body. This is the time to take vitamin C, and Vitamin B5 to support your adrenals. Also add in lots of vegetables and well-cooked warm, nurturing meals. Ensure to get some physical exercise- it’s the best cure to release stress hormones.
- Pamper yourself: Nurturing yourself in times of stress goes a long way. Take warm baths, as they are a wonderful way to release toxins. Now may be the time to take a short break away as it can help you recharge your batteries and get some perspective.
- Get closure: Closure is an important aspect of letting things go. Take a few days and let your emotions settle, and then find a way to put the event behind you. One way is to write a letter expressing all that you need to say and then tearing it up. People find this process cathartic. Keep writing and letting go as the need arises. If the crisis is about bereavement, illness or something of that nature, then spend some time and share your feelings with Allah swt. Allow yourself to seek His help and release the pain in a constructive way. Reading duas, reflection and prayer makes a huge difference.
- Clarify your intention: Difficult circumstances present us with an opportunity for growth. This is an invitation to think about what kind of person you would like to be. What are you taking away from this experience? How are you going to use it to develop even more strength and compassion in your life?
We all do the best we can in any given moment of time. These tips are presented to you in the hope that they will give you a starting point when you are dealing with tremendous pain and stress. I hope that you will find the peace and solace you need. Turn to prayer and the comfort of loved ones, and indeed you will turn the situation around.